Will

I hate the pain
That’s what I say
And I really really do
But I can look around
At my wife and cat
And not feel so blue
My past has hurt
In many ways
But things are better still
I deal with the pain
With love and support
From friends who strengthen my will

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Got to be

Another streak
4 days old
Injured by anger
Saddled by stress
Deepening despair
And empty energy
Leaves me paralyzed
My mind numbing
My body screaming
Tired of it
Tired of it
Days are fine
Days are good
Days then suck the most
Never know
Never plan
Someday
Any day
There’s got to be
Got to be a way

I Wept Today

I wept today
Sitting lonely
On my porch
Wondering
What happened
To this life
To this body
Feeling the isolation
The separation
From my dreams
From my vision
I weep now
As I type
Blurred letters
On a white screen
The aches pound
The pain strangles
Everything is not
Not what I wanted
I wept today

Time to Rest

Excruciating
Debilitating
Limiting
Exhausting
All words I could use
The pain is flaring
And uncaring
But my pride ignores
Pride in the fighter I can be
The fighter that I am
The weekend ends
The rest begins
3 days for each 1 spent
The pain is here
No need to bitch
But I fought through the weekend
And now I will rest

One Thing is Certain

It seems so hard
To find the point of each day
Never knowing what will be
Hoping the pain will not stay

Worries about the pressure
Building in the air
This takes it toll
From foot to hair

Will I be able
To get outside
Enjoy the sun
Take my car for a ride

Everyday comes
Right after the last
Then another follows
Leaving the day in the past

But what is the point
To each and every day
I never really know
It’s really hard to say

One thing is certain
I don’t have to know
I will just keep fighting
And continue to grow

Mission for the Day

I swear I saw it
It lifted off the ground
What would my house be like
If my couch wasn’t around

There’s no way
I can let it go
I am the boss
So it’s time to show

The good days have left
And the mission is clear
The weekend will be spent
Pinning my couch, with my rear